[22 September, 2010]

on being bisexual

Huh, I haven't thought or said this out loud in years. Because even I, much like the rest of the world, have fallen into the trap of thinking that just because I am a woman married to a man, I must be heterosexual. But of course, it's not really true, and I need to stop letting my relationship define my identity*.

This summer, what with the whole Prop 8 debate and various movements for social change springing up across the country, the APA Convention featured research specifically on LGBT topics. As I sat through lecture after lecture from leading scientists in this field, it became apparent how important claiming one's identity and finding a community is for psychological health. I felt empowered. Scared, and slightly embarrassed of my easily disguised as majority status, but also ready to be more vocal.

Because there are a lot of misconceptions, or simply unknowns, about bisexuality. Most people tend to think of it either as adolescent experimentation that fades into heterosexuality or as a gateway to homosexuality, but not as a stand-alone orientation. I guess these assumptions might stem from our need to categorize and the simplicity of labeling a relationship by the two sexes involved. But we need to understand and educate ourselves about this phenomenon that affects a good number of people, so that it might bring us closer to a more enlightened, peaceful and accepting world.

*Meaning that the person I chose to share my life with happens to be a man, and because we are in a monogamous relationship, I haven't given my attractions a lot of thought lately. But when I am honest and genuine with myself, my fantasies include both men and women. Both sexes have a equal potential for hotness.

2 sighs or salutations:

piccadillous | 24 September, 2010

Whereas I still think that everyone is on the Kinsey continuum!

daria | 25 September, 2010

Well yeah, I believe in the Kinsey continuum as well (and maybe this topic in itself could use some public air time). But while people still think in dichotomous terms, I want to advocate for some sort of middle ground (however large that ground may be). Plus, inevitably, labels are useful for research and organizational purposes. So that's what I'm going with for now.

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