fight like a girl

Ack. Things keep happening in my internal life. Things I would like to document here, for history's and reflection's sake. Writing about which perpetually falls pretty low on my daily to-do lists, right underneath persevering through school work and immediate deadlines, writing up my research results so I can finally and officially receive my masters degree/certificate, and you know, saving people's psychological lives.

This past Sunday was the first time in over six months, since my friend's suicide, that I got anywhere close to drove across the Golden Gate Bridge. It was a stormy afternoon, just like the days prior full of non-stop rain. The clouds hung low across the Bay and covered most of the golden towers. All I could see around me was gray interspersed with the sparkling lights of cars. Even so, I noticed dark silhouettes walking gloomily along the bridge sidewalk. Why anyone would be out there in that type of weather is beyond me; you couldn't see much of anything, and especially not the San Francisco skyline, besides rain, storm clouds, and the churning waters below. My eyes kept shifting from the road ahead to the railing to my side. 

As far as I could tell, nobody jumped while I drove across, but I think my heart still skipped a beat or two.